When life is going smoothly, I look out at the world’s problems and with relative ease shout a hearty “amen” to God’s promises. I sit among those weighted down by burdens and assure them with confidence of God’s faithfulness and competency to abundantly meet all their needs. His promises seem as clear as day, and declaring the truth feels as natural as breathing. But when the tide turns and these same trials engulf me, my heart tends to faint. I enter a protective zone -- preserving myself, begging God to take the trouble away. Those previously at the forefront of my concerns disappear to some obscure place where I can’t see or hear their needs. My own cries take center stage, drowning out the voices of everyone around me. “Help me God,” I cry. “Deliver me from this mess so I can serve you again.”
This week some difficulties formed an alliance, it seems, and overtook me in a weak moment while my armor lay carelessly on the floor. The “what if’s” were right behind them, reminding me that danger and further suffering were looming. Overrun with worries that these somewhat insignificant trials could morph into long-term, life-changing ones I surrendered to paralyzing fear.
As I sat googling my health problems and looking at pictures that resembled something out of a horror movie, the phone rang. It was a sweet young girl who had called me months ago to talk about struggles she was experiencing. Since I’d faced the same challenges, I was able to assure her of God’s faithfulness and his deliverance. Most importantly, I emphasized the blessing in the trial, that God would use it for good in spite of the pain it was causing her at the moment.
Her voice was calm and composed as she told me she had some really good news. Her story wasn’t one of instant deliverance like I’d been praying for but one of grace. God brought another hurting person into her life and gave her the joy and insight to encourage them, thus fulfilling his promise in 2 Cor. 1:4. The same comfort that she’d received in her suffering was now overflowing from her heart into the life of another, and the blessing was such that she was filled with joy. She explained that this picture of “God working all things together for good” was a huge turning point in her mind as to how she viewed her hardship. Though she was still struggling to some degree, she could now understand for the first time how God intended to use it as a blessing.
I hung up the phone with the certainty that I was standing on holy ground. I’d been crying out to God for mercy and deliverance, and this was my answer. Her call reminded me to shift my focus from the demand for deliverance to an acceptance of Christ’s grace and mercy in my weakness. Regardless of my circumstances, I needed to rest in God’s peace knowing that he would work them together for my good and use them to bless others. This trial and all the others I've endured aren’t just for me, though I know I’m being changed. Through suffering, he gives me mercy and compassion for people who are also hurting, possibly going through the same hardships.
God is at work in me “to will and to act according to his good purpose.” He’s conforming me and reshaping my desires, using these hardships to help me realize my finiteness and his greatness, to see them side by side in such a way as one would look upon a gigantic mountain from the valley beneath. It’s not to crush me, to overwhelm me, but to deliver me from the disease of self aggrandizement where I think somehow that I’ve arrived and that I deserve what I’ve been given. It’s to set me free to know with absolute conviction that it’s by grace I stand and by grace I succeed at anything.
My friend’s story brought me to tears. I was joyful for her victory through the fulfillment of God’s promises in bringing healing and restoration. And I was grieving my lack of faith and how my own trials had so quickly left me disillusioned. Turning to my husband who was just yards away I asked, “What would I do if I had cancer or some terminal disease? How could I handle it when something this small has freaked me out?” Without even a pause he said, “The same way you’ve gotten through…….” And he began listing off what seemed insurmountable trials in the past. “By God’s grace,” he said with a gentle and accepting face. Before he could finish I was in his arms and crying like a child, thankful that he loved me in spite of myself, and even more thankful that God’s love extended way beyond his.
That’s what the Christian life is all about, isn’t it? Growing, changing, tasting victory and then realizing through yet another trial that while we’ve grown we still have a ways to go. It’s about God’s love so amazingly poured out through his Spirit, his word and his people as together they cheer us on, challenge us, bind up our wounds, and love us when we feel anything but lovable. It’s about us comforting and encouraging others as they go through what we’ve experienced. It’s about amazing grace that God orchestrates in each of our lives as we trust in him.
"He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us" 2 Cor 1:4.
"He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us" 2 Cor 1:4.
